Reflections on Gratitude

Because everyone else is doing it, so why not :)

I know the holiday season is complicated, especially if we’re experiencing grief, difficult circumstances, or strained family dynamics. Even Thanksgiving itself carries some mixed emotions and ugly history, on a day that’s intended for counting our blessings.

In a slight departure from my usual style, this newsletter is a series of short stories and random thoughts I’ve had over the last few weeks about gratitude and abundance. However you’re feeling, I hope you can find a moment of joy and hang onto it, or do whatever you need to take care of yourself this season.

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I looked outside at the bare branches of the trees in our backyard. Just weeks earlier, they were full of beautifully colored leaves, and now they’re all gone. Fall, my favorite time of year, is slowly giving way to the winter chill. A few weeks ago, I thought to take a photo of the trees while hanging out with Della in our backyard, as if it would stretch out the season, or at least my memory.

A thought popped in: Is it easier to feel gratitude for the fleeting things, the moments we know won’t last long?

I thought of the upcoming holiday season and when would be the best time to put up our Christmas decorations between our Thanksgiving plans. I perked up thinking of how much I enjoy turning off all the lights, switching on the tree, and sitting by its light while watching TV and drinking tea or hot chocolate. The holiday season is also short, but enjoyable in its own way.

I watched a squirrel jump around the bare branches, which can only be seen clearly now that the foliage has fallen away. I start to accept that each new season has beauty, even if there are things we miss about the one that’s ending.

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I pack another shirt into the bags I’ve amassed for donation, something I do throughout the year as I notice things I don’t wear anymore. I feel grateful for how useful these items have been to me, and the fact that I’m able to give from overflow. The decluttering routine becomes an abundance practice.

Later, as I consider a GoFundMe for a community member, I realize that even as I try to save money, there are others with a greater need. I’m thankful that I’m able to give something without depleting my reserves.

Suddenly the things I think I need or want seem shallow in comparison, and I remind myself that there are times for giving and receiving. I remember how powerful our resources are when we pay it forward. Before I submit my donation, I try something new and say a prayer to bless it and infuse it with love and abundance for whoever receives it.

Even though it feels counterintuitive, it’s interesting how holding something loosely, letting it go, or being unattached to a specific outcome creates more room, a signal to the universe that we have the capacity to receive. Gifts flow in and out of our lives like ocean waves, just as plants die and bloom with the changing seasons, and animals (and people) take time for rest and activity. Our lives mimic nature and the subtle forces of balance at play.

The Prayer of Saint Francis, an old remnant of my Catholic school days, rings in the back of my mind: “For it is in giving that we receive…in pardoning that we are pardoned…in dying that we’re born to eternal life.”

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Remembering my intention to stay present, I take a moment to savor the things that are always there. I admire our house and all that we’ve done to make it a home. I hug Bryan for a few extra seconds as he grabs his coffee before going back to work. I sit on the couch a while longer, rub the softest part of Della’s belly, and tell her she’s the sweetest, goodest girl. (All grammar goes out the window when I’m talking to her, as does my normal speaking voice.)

Nothing is guaranteed, and I know life is too short not to take notice of the signs of abundance all around me. I know I’m living the life that past me dreamed about. Even then, I know there’s still more where that came from. There’s something good to be found in every new chapter.

What little joys are you finding? I’d love to hear about them!

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The Overshare Zone

Looking forward to: Time with family over Thanksgiving and celebrating my birthday on the 28th. (Yay! Sagittarius season!) The Thanksgiving meal with my family usually includes talking about everything, even politics (because that’s just what we do) and ends with apple pie and birthday cake. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Considering: A new, lighthearted section for this newsletter called, “Random Stuff I’ve Tried,” where I talk about—you guessed it—all my random experiments. In true Sagittarius fashion, I’m always learning and trying new things, so I’ll let you know if I recommend it or not.

Finishing strong (or at least trying to): The 830 Burpees Challenge to complete 830 burpees during the month of November. The Wounded Warrior Project started this challenge to raise awareness for the 83% of warriors living with PTSD. My friend Jen signed up and started a fundraising/challenge group, which we aptly named, “Excuse Me, I Burpeed.” Even though I hate burpees, I like to find different ways to remind myself that I can do hard things. I also know that staying active on a regular basis is easier for me I have a specific goal or structure in mind. So far I’m staying on pace to finish out the month, but I may double up a couple days just to get it over with. Ha!

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